April 10: A Vogon Affair

My uggerblat delivered me a note
All writ in blagcious pildering, which smelt
Of wholded cradgerous, inciting bloat
Which plorped and made each vuvulation melt.

Inveigling proopish fashigoobs with words
Beslavering my varishing physique,
And offering a plungitude of flurds
If only I’d missuage his bludderleak.

But when I folded up this fabberdink,
I saw it was a form ought seven two.
My uggerblat was gullfullish to think
That I would gospingbrap a fardelsmew.

I flurked that cobblequirt where it squilked most.
And that’s why I now occupy his post.

Inspiration: Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, Ode to a Small Lump of Green Putty I Found in My Armpit One Midsummer Morning.

6 thoughts on “April 10: A Vogon Affair

    • I come by it honestly! 😀 I am planning to do a proper Carrollian salute with portmanteau words, but the fun challenge of this one was inventing gross and/or offensive/sounding words. Someone actually wrote an example of Vogon poetry, which was my direct inspiration. The phrase “lurgid bee” is unforgettable 😀

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