An influential teacher once described
Those voices of self-doubt that plague one’s sleep
Chihuahuas, whose incessant yips and gibes
Convince one that the price of action’s steep,

Resulting in paralysis, despair,
Depression, paired with self-effacing fevers.
The only cure of which I am aware:
Replace Chihuahuas with Golden Retrievers.

“You ought to hate yourself, but I love you!”
“You should do better, but you’re the best master!”
“That thing you keep forgetting you should do
Do when you can, just throw that ball much faster!”

Self-loathing cannot but face a deferral
When it’s accompanied by cries of “SQUIRREL!”